Recently I welcomed another pretty-feathered person into my life - my boyfriend Matt, who keeps his hair with a river-blue turquoise underlayer. So this post is two-fold in purpose - one, about using unnatural dye for male styles, specifically our experience; and two, because some of my readers have requested to see more of my new prince ;)

-one box of bleach from the drugstore, Herbal Essences (I was lucky enough to pick up a box n sale for $4, most others look about $9)

-a rat tailed comb, the kind with a long handle ending in a point

-one bottle of my favorite brand of dye, Special Effects, in Fishbowl (you can see me wearing it last summer by clicking here!) This color is just the right balance of blue and green. Matt wanted a green, but I thought a blue would pick up his eyes more - and this color is the best of both worlds.

-tinfoil

First things first, we started off with a clean head of hair and a test strand. This means I snip out a chunk of his hair from where it's darkest - the lower layers in the back, closest to his roots - and tap it securely to a piece of paper or tin foil. Then we put some of the bleach on to see just how long it takes for his hair to lighten enough. To recap for those unfamiliar with the process of unnatural color dying: your must bleach hair first to attain any kind of brightness. The dye itself is like colored cellophane - most easily distinguishable when shown against light colors.

Therefore if you are not a light or diamond blonde, it's best if you bust out the bleach first.

In Matt's case, it took half an hour before his hair lightened to a color reminiscent of honey or peanut butter. We wanted a deeper jewel tone instead of a techno-ish neon, so this was the right choice. I used the rat-tail's comb to select a few under layers in his bangs to bleach, then wrapped them in tin foil so they could develop. Half an hour later, the now-blonde strands get the same treatment - except they get smothered in blue dye before being wrapped in fresh foil. Don't forget plastic gloves when you do this! The dye can definitely stain your hands, nails, and clothes. (Protip: put the best brand away when dying your or your signifigant other's hair!)

If you're shooting for a pastel, let the dye sit for only ten minutes or so - refreshing my candy pink means a very short time on my hair, which is especially susceptible because multiple dyings make the hair more porous, or likely to soak up the color. In Matt's case we were shooting for something darker and more in the denim/teal family, so we left his dye on for about half an hour. For super crazy bright color, you can even leave the dye on over night. There's no developer or chemicals, just veggie dye, so it's safe to do so.

The result? One very happy bluehaired boy! (I'm not sure the term 'bluehead' is ever going to catch on...)

Our next challenge is to dye his beard with a little blue to match. Bleach is likely to irritate the sensitive skin of the face, especially since he has sensitive skin to begin with, so it will be an interesting experiment. But the appeal of a modern French fairytale Bluebeard is too great to resist! Hopefully with a little luck, I'll post photos of his new devilishly bluebeared prince style next!

Links

click the links on Pink Please! for more helpful and how-to articles on unnatural hair dye!

That's the punchline, girls. Well, according to the marketers, anyway.

What's really going on in this commercial? First we see a battle that unfortunately too many are familiar with: a dessert that you want but shouldn't have. Is this girl dieting or just worried about getting fat? She's clearly not overweight in this commercial - why is she so nervous about eating it? What does she see when she looks in the mirror? How many fad diets has she been on that she thinks 'running in place' while she eats it might be a good idea? What about her rival, the envied, weight-losing coworker? Does she envy the control she has over her own body and desires? Is she envious that she seems to drop weight without any of the deprivation and struggle that seem so hard for her? And what about the girl who tricks her body into thinking it's eating dessert while chowing down on fat-free yogurt? Would she rather chuck the yogurt and eat the real thing too, as she slops imitation goop into her mouth, thinking vengefully about her bikini-unworthy butt? Or is she really so pleased that she can happily 'have her cake and eat it too' like the commercial says? And why is she so concerned about saving the 100-odd calories she gets from eating yogurt versus the actual cheesecake? And craziest of all, the marketing think tank down at Yoplait believes that we should be identifying and nodding along in agreement with these calorie-counting, stomach-tricking, jogging-in-place people.

It's enough to make anyone - myself included, making the dog jump - "Just eat the cake already!"

The average woman has a very weird relationship with food. It's like the Mean Girls quote: "Girls who eat their feelings... girls who don't eat anything." Girls can go on juice fasts, liquidize wheat grass, try eating six small meals a day, eat suppliments, take diet pills, count points, stop eating carbs, cut out fried food, go vegetarian, go vegan, go whole-grain, go dairy-free, go sugar-free, go crazy. We know all that already. Every women's magazine, television spot, radio ad, and late night informercial is talking about how women lose weight. Slap on a few airbrushed models, a couple fashion week photos, and Playboy, and we've got our situation put together.

Let's wander out of the mainstream picture and start looking at our own little kingdom, lolita. As I always chant, lolitas are nothing more than regular girls experiencing the world a little differently. We're certainly not immune to the pressures of food/not food, size good/size bad. As much as we want to escape the confines of mainstream expectations, we still can't escape our own ideas of beauty and body image. Lolita, as a subculture, is based around the ideals of fashion, and fashion is based around the notion of being ideal. Fashion is to create an artwork out of an ordinary human being - to be a work of art. But when the canvas you see in the mirror is not like the ones you want to create, how do you cope? Lolitas are supposed to be doll-like, princess-like, mythical - things of perfection. I would estimate that many perfectionists are drawn to lolita, due to its nature - matching colors, tiny details, complex makeup and rigid structure. And perfectionists are the ones most susceptible to the malice of body image, even to the edge of body dysmorphic syndrome. A friend of mine, after a couple comments outright stating such, now worries constantly about a body part in lolita. Is it the usual hotspots - butt, boobs, waist? No - she's worried about her knees. Instead of picking out cute socks or enjoying a new dress, she's trying to figure out how to minimize her knees - tights? Over the knees or knee highs?

Thank you everyone who came to see Dalin of La Vida Frills, Crystal of Pretty Wonderland, and myself speak at Kinokuniya Bookstore this Saturday! The seats were packed and quickly turned to standing room only! It was great to see so many lolitas out supporting lolita style and subculture in honor of International Lolita Day :) Everyone looked great, despite the extreme humidity!

Subcultures are the vogue of our generation. For years we dissected the youth of the world into categories that seemed, to the psychologists among us, juvenile and two-dimensional: skater, jock, prep, and other high-school worthy labels. But eventually society began to realize that what may have seemed to be nothing more than local hoodlums or 'those weird kids' were actually something more. These groups began to develop their own customs and traditions, their own socialization patterns, their own 'tribe markers' and symbolism, and in some cases, even their own religions. They began to break away from the mass culture of their country and instead divide into smaller sects within it. This was what we call subculture. Some examples of subculture that most people are familiar with: the hippies, the beatniks, the goths, the punks... And now the newer, ever-evolving subcultures of the new millenium like internet culture, fandoms, steampunk, and even... lolita.

For the longest time, both in Japan and overseas, the debate has ensued: what is lolita to its practioners? Is it a fashion style alone? Is it a concept? Is it a state of mind? Is it a lifestyle? Or is it, like those other mold-breakingly attired peoples to come before it, a subculture?

To answer this question, there is the obvious: what makes up a subculture? What seperates subculture from a trend, from a fashion statement?

On the surface, lolita appears to be merely a fashion. It is heavily invested in clothes and outward appearance. Most girls do not spend 100% of their time in lolita fashion, or spend 100% of their time only with others interested in lolita fashion. Does this make it a weekend warrior-style hobby? Is lolita fashion no different than dressing in this season's florals?

When it comes down to lolita, it is not the clothes that seperate us most distinctly from the mainstream. Yes, those layers and layers of lace and petticoats may seem to be what all the fuss is about, but lolita fashion - the adverse choices in clothing we make - is not what lolita is purely about. Lolita fashion does not exist in a bubble, on a page, or in a theatrical production. Not only do we interact with the world as a whole, we are also interacting with each other.

Lolita fashion is the jumping-off point for our subculture. Whether it is the fashion that attracts like people together or like people are attracted to the fashion, it is hard to say. However, it is obvious that one of the most definable traits of someone in lolita subculture is their appearance. This isn't just about fashion (an entire other article could be written on fashion and how this relates to lolita social hierarchy, but I'll spare you this round), but also permanent changes to one's appearance. Just like industrial goth is usually accompanied by piercings, lolita has its own physical markings. Some of the most typical are blunt cut bangs or, more iconically, the hime cut; sweet lolitas may also lean towards unnaturally colored hair and lolitas of any style seem to favor bleach blonde. I'm currently sporting the 'split' - half blonde, half pink - which is in style at the moment. When I am asked about my unusual hair style, I usually want to respond - 'Well, it's in style right now with my culture.' To respond simply with 'in style' would be confusing if you're not familiar with the current lolita scene. In style does not mean in style with the mainstream. The mainstream is following completely different trends based on different nuances of pop cultural media and celebrities. The subculture follows its own trends and has its own perceptions of beauty, some of which may even be counterculture to that of the mainstream.

One of the most prominent parts of a subculture is its shared knowledge, morals, or even history. Lolitas possess at the very least a shared knowledge. This is fueled by the rituals and traditions necessary to execute the fashion style (such as, petticoats go below skirts), but also pop culture and its timeline, and a glossary of words specific to the fashion and the culture's traditions. While working through cultural issues with the crew of American Lolita, it became apparent that half of what I was saying to them was gibberish. "Wait, what is Moi-Meme-Moitie and how is that like Moi Dix Mois?" French accents notwithstanding, we soon realized that what the entire crew needed was a compiled short dictionary translating 'lolita' to English. Think of all the words and simple turns of phrase we inside the culture take for granted - JSK, OP, NWT, cutsew, shirorori, Kikikirara Shoten. To anyone outside of the lolita scene - the subculture - these words are entirely without meaning. But I could say these to any lolita and be understood. And this is only the tip of the jargon iceberg - because lolita subculture is heavily participated in over the internet, acronyms and shorthand are just as necessary. Some of the above terms are nothing more than letters, which stand for different terms - JSK for jumperskirt - which can then be translated into spoken terms when used in real life conversation.

Our shared history is from pop culture - the first Gothic and Lolita Bible, collection of popular models, and fashion trends of the past. Older lolitas recall the days of rectangular headdresses, Angelic Pretty's older prints, or the earlier works of Imai Kira. Kamikaze Girls is also a great example of how a shared fascination with pop cultural media has shaped our subculture. Many girls consider the film an initiation rite into the fashion and culture; many say that the lessons it teaches are the beginnings of lolita concepts and moral themes.

The fact that much of lolita culture is shared and participated in online also contributes to the notion of lolita subculture's shared history. High impact events mostly play out online, and many in the community participate - such as great scandals and scammer alerts. This shared history bonds us together. Those not present for earlier events usually learn of them secondhand - it's often that a lolita will say, 'Oh, it was before my time, but I heard about...' Lolita culture is mostly relayed by word of mouth or secondhand, in what could almost be considered an oral tradition.

Concepts are also part of the culture. Most brands or even magazines provide a basic concept or mission statement to solidify the look and emotion they are trying to portray. Another example is the basic concept of gothic culture - the darker emotions and shadowy style that overlays the entire genre. If I had to choose a concept to overlay the general lolita culture, I would say it is personal fufillment to the point of excess. In a word, opulence. The princess motif, the sweets-to-cavities style, the rise of decololi, all point at opulence - our Rococo inheritance - as our key theme. Other smaller themes are peppered throughout the culture - beauty for beauty's sake, a sense of personal independence bordering on solitude, a sense of entitlement, and a multitude of others. These themes unite our knowledge and media consumption into a mass interpretation. They form the basis for what our culture stands upon.

Dissecting a subculture piece by piece is an exhaustive process, moreso to argue the point. In honor of International Lolita Day, our bi-annual celebration of lolita fashion, community, and culture, I would like to declare that we as a group stand up and be counted as a subculture. This is Part 1 of the series. I will continue to discuss the argument supporting lolita as not just a fashion, but as a subculture throught the following articles. Stay tuned!