Lolita Charm: Surviving a Fashion Identity Crisis

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Surviving a Fashion Identity Crisis

It happened to me. I was lolling over my laptop, scrolling past rows and rows of pink Angelic Pretty dresses. Tea party shoes. They come in every color known to the lolita (essentially, pastels, the only color our rods and cones can perceive, apparently!), every lolita seems to have about three pairs stashed in her closet. Even I have a pair of white ones, or, to turn a phrase, 'marshmallow'. And when I wore an outfit that required white shoes, out they came - as my requisite pair of white shoes. So there I am, at the hairdresser's, balancing my tea parties on the chair bar, when a twenty-something women walks in - in these adorable high heels. I look at her shoes. I look at my shoes. And I realize that lolita shoes just don't do it for me.

As my friends well know now, you can hear me coming - I'm the only girl on campus who routinely wears a pair of heels. My tea parties are officially unused in a box in my closet. They're very cute - on other people. I like they way they look on other girls - but they're not for me. They don't put that spring in my step, make my feet feels like an elegant pas du chat, you know?

I think that was the first of many tiny fashion identity crises.

Lolitas have a unique difficulty when it comes to what they wear and why. For the beginner lolita, it's not as bad - you just found this new, beautiful style, and want all you can get. Gothic and Lolita can be your sole subscription. You can wear an Angelic Pretty coordinate fresh off the page and feel happy about it. Or even after all your long years in the fashion, you're still a purist. That's great - you help keep the foundation of our fashion alive! But some of the older lolitas start having a problem, especially as they are exposed to more and more new ideas - whether from Japan or otherwise. They start wanting to... color outside the lines, so to speak.

And that's ok too.

The trouble is that, to identify and be accepted as a lolita, you must wear lolita items in a certain formula. It's not enough to simply buy a bunch of brand and wear it however you like - wherein lies the issue. Even a silhouette might not be enough to consider an outfit lolita - in my last outfit, the hairstyle (fluffy ponytail), shoes (high heels) and unusual blouse could all make the case for 'not really lolita'. Even though the effect is very sweet lolita, it isn't quite up to formula. A peter pan blouse, lower-heeled shoes, and fluffy pigtails might be all that's necessary. But that's enough of a difference, is the general consensus.

Lolita is, in my opinion, developed as a subculture - not just a fashion style. But for it to be a subculture, it needs to loosen its rules on who exactly can be in that subculture. Would my outfit not allow me to say, this is lolita? I would love to see lolita expanded beyond the formulaic definition to include styles of the same aestheticism that aren't exactly on pair with anatomy, so to speak. Often demoted to 'casual' style, I feel these outfits are lolita in their own right. They don't require any less care, femininity, or possibly even brand. Here are a few examples, scanned from my copy of Alice Deco a La Mode Volume 2:

Of course, this is also impacted by who you encounter in your clothes. Are you going to be presenting the outfit to other lolitas, online or in person, or will you be simply wearing them around? And the real question is, should that matter? Does anyone have the right to say, well, most of the time you fit in, but that ponytail's not lolita, so for today you're no longer 'in' lolita? This clashes with the idea of the subculture. For a fashion indiscretion, you can be tossed from your chosen category - if only for today. Often people say, just don't call it lolita and then you can wear it however you want, but I'm not sure if I agree with that. There is an importance to keeping the style, as a basis pure - much like foundation, but it's not only the foundation that makes a prettily made-up face.

I think the root behind 'fashion identity crisis' is that we, unlike other fashionista, have an identity - that as a lolita. To suddenly feel like part of that identity doesn't work for you is a little scary. You worry that if headbows aren't you thing, maybe you're drifting away from lolita? Or maybe you feel your current substyle isn't hitting the mark anymore? And if that's the case, will you no longer be into lolita, which has worked itself into so much of how you identify yourself?

Surviving Your Fashion Identity Crisis

Decide what it is you like about lolita - the colors, the motifs, the princess style?

See where else you find those elements, either in Japanese or mainstream fashion. For example, sweet lolita and fairy-kei share a lot of the same color palette, and himegyaru has the same princess feel.
Make a collage of look-book of all the items, coordinates, or photoshoots you like. You can either print and then paste your photos into a real book, or you can just save them all to a folder on your hard drive. I have a huge folder called 'inspiration'!
Apply to your wardrobe as needed!

Sometimes we continue on our path to lolita, sometimes other styles begin to mix with that, and sometimes we quit all together, and that's fine, so long as you are happy with your style. I would love to see the name lolita expanded to more fluctuation and ability to mix-and-match, across style and within as well as outside of the formula.

How do you like to wear your lolita items? Do you prefer to stay inside the lines or go beyond that? Do you think it's important that lolita remain specifically 'lolita'?

Labels: culture, discussion, fashion, inspirational

16 Comments:

At October 17, 2009 at 9:40 PM , mousse said...: I love this article! I really felt like I was the only girl who wore heels with lolita. I really enjoy the colours and origins of the fashion, and that is why I was drawn to it. I adore all types of lolita, but I like to mix in other styles as well (esp. vintage,Victorian, Edwardian and Natural kei and fairy-tale peices), and I always wear high shoes because I am after all a woman, not a girl. My main goal is to always look like I just stepped out of a magical story ♥
I am always pro self expression, and I would encourage everyone to mix up their wardroble to find their person style!
At October 17, 2009 at 9:55 PM , Corvida said...: Alas, this is a question I haven't been able to answer (and I've been struggling with it for months)! Maybe lolita will someday end up like goth: Decades ago, gothic fashion was mostly dark Victorian and industrial, but now there's cyber, glitter, casual, etc. That worked for goth because there were so many other features--literature, worldview, music--that united the subculture. Since lolita stems primarily from the fashion, I think it will be much more difficult to make that transition. Also, we have to decide if that's the sort of thing we want. I'm all for inclusivity... the more people that join the party, the more fun everyone can have. But lolita is so special and beautiful; do we really want to water it down?

In the end, I'm ecstatic that Viv started using "quaintrelle." I think lolita fits quite nicely as a branch. That way, lolita can still retain its sartorial definition, while other beautiful styles get praise instead of, "Well, it's cute, but not quite right."

P.S., I'm the only heel-wearer on my campus, too!
At October 17, 2009 at 10:30 PM , Anonymous said...: I get the same sort of feeling when looking at Alice DECO a la mode. I think its great Lolita fashion is twisted in a way that is unexpected. After a while, when you see everyone follow the lolita outfit formula to a T - it starts looking repetitive and uninteresting. I'll see some of the unusual pairings in Alice and love it - and then sometimes I see stuff in there and think... that's not Lolita at all and I don't know WHAT it is... but I still love it.
At October 18, 2009 at 1:37 AM , kabe_no_hana said...: I agree with Corvida above, about the Lolita subculture lacking the features that unite other subcultures. Since all we really have are the clothes and the aesthetic to mark us as Lolitas, I think that's why the "rules" of the fashion are taken so seriously by lots of people. In fact, I still can't decide whether I believe that Lolita is a true subculture. Of course, whenever I lean toward the "it's just clothing, nothing more" side, I read blogs like yours that make me reconsider. Thanks for writing such thought-provoking pieces on Lolita. :D
At October 18, 2009 at 3:41 AM , Juli said...: I like to think of the "Lolita formula" as a set of guidelines you may or may not want to follow, like the sketch for a drawing.
I really disagree with that nitpicky mentality of "this blouse/hair/shoes/whatever is wrong", as if the person HAD to follow those guidelines - and if she does not, it's because she doesn't know better. Such stiff set of rules makes Lolita feel like a costume for me at times. This lack of flexibility is kinda disheartening. =/
Your ideas about this question are very like mine! Especially when you talk about the effect an outfit has... I, too, believe the overall feel of an outfit should count more than the items alone.

And I recently came to think about, like Corvida pointed out, maybe Lolita lacks something that unites it as a subculture. I used to frown upon this idea because I've never liked the concept of "being true" that usually comes along subcultures, implying that you must, for example, like some specific bands, or act in a specific way to belong that group.
However, ends up that "being true" is not that important inside a subculture as it seems to be, and Lolita seems to have embraced this idea very strongly even it being "just fashion". Go figure! XD
I think lolitas should grasp more to the concept of the fashion than the rules, and allow themselves some "coloring outside the lines", as you put. That's why I'm liking the idea of Quaintrelle so much too!
At October 18, 2009 at 3:52 AM , Luzmaría Alam said...: I think you made a good point!! When i meet lolita style, a star to look the shoes, and i thought o my good ther look like a cake or something like that XDD. but we need to make our own inspiration and style, lolita can reflects our taste... ;)
take care
At October 18, 2009 at 3:59 AM , Saffron Sugar said...: I think it's nice to see some creativity and variation in Lolita. Basically, I think everything is okay but you have to make it work. As long as it looks nice, it's acceptable :3 And I don't think you should be forced into something you're uncomfortable with just because it's "supposed" to be like that.

For example.

I don't wear flat shoes. I just can't. They make my back hurt, and I'm already short enough! So I wear high heels practically every day. With Lolita, I only wear high heels as well. I don't see why people would ever think flat shoes are more appropriate - almost every Lolita brand out there has released multiple pairs of heels. It's some mysterious myth xD

Anyway, I think the problem with Lolita is indeed that we only have the clothes to base our subculture on. But now that we HAVE a visual, why won't we focus on building a culture? I say, more meet-ups and events and magazines and all that stuff!
At October 18, 2009 at 8:13 AM , Natália Espinosa said...: I believe that changing one thing or another and another and another is what makes lolita so enchanting. I'm smitten by the variety of personalities of the Lolitas I know: the sweet, pastel princess, the classical victorian doll, the punkish sweetheart, etc. It's wonderful that this fashion has such a powerful appeal - and this appeal, I believe, comes from the little personal touch we apply everytime we decide not to be a clone for a while.
I love your post! Btw, I think lolitas wearing high heels are beautiful.
I have been through a hard time ith my hair - my Lolita Identity Crisis. I like it short and bangs surely don't suit me. I'm trying not to think of it, but it's hard...
At October 18, 2009 at 10:06 AM , Anonymous said...: you speak from the bottom of my heart, girl!

well i am not into heels, because i'm clumsy and therefore hurt myself accidently often enough without the added danger of heels ^^ but i do love to combine my sweetest lolita styles with my big black, chunky boots because i loooove the contrast. i often skip the headbow and i love my big bad black courdory jacket with it's oh so unloli big collar and it's punk-like feel. but being one of only threee "real" lolitas in my town/my university it really doesn't matter. i stick to the rules, when i go to meetups, but seeing as nobody will notice wether i wear the "right" kind of weird outfits or not i just don't care. as long as it's me it will be fine. i'll look strange to most people anyway XD
At October 18, 2009 at 10:58 AM , Victoria Suzanne said...: @Mousse: everything about your comment, I love ♥

@Corvida: Yes, I see both your points. Sometimes I think the lifestyle lolitas are on the edge of being a subculture, with the interest in literature (loli_bookclub on LJ), music (like Kanon Wakeshima), and sometimes even philosophy (like I discuss on this blog), but I don't like the idea of watering-down either, to the day when beautiful, elaborate lolita is rare. I think there should be equal parts of both, you know?

@CarouselofCrowns: That's exactly why I like Alice Deco! It's kind of my idol :)

@kabe_no_hana: It could definitely go either way, there are strong responses from both camps that seem plausible! I don't believe one can be a lolita if never having dressed with at least the aesthetics (like the girls who say, I am only a lolita in my heart), because it is about the fashion first and foremost, but maybe the fashion is too rigid. and thank you for the lovely compliment!

@Juli: I like your analogy! I've heard it's like coloring in a drawing, that you can color it unusual colors but should stay within the lines... however I like yours a little better! I think that is where 'quaintrelle' is headed, but I'm not sure if it will really unite... we can only see!

@Princess: I think everyone looks at the shoes first, too! ;)

@SaffronSugar: I feel absolutely the same about heels vs. flats! Flats just don't make me happy, I'd rather have brand heels! And you raise an interesting question: why shouldn't we focus on building a subculture? Goodness knows we've built enough styles and substyles.

@akito: That is also something I love about lolita, that there are so many different ways to bake a cake, so to speak! And I think that short hair on lolita is beautiful, too! My friend Miss Lumpy has a pretty, short little bob right now that is very 1920s, adorable! And it makes your headdress the focal piece! You can find lots of ideas of what to do with short hair in Alice Deco volumes 1 and 2, as well!

@Anonymous: I saw a beautiful Alice Deco coordinate which is entirely pink and sweet, but with giant engineer boots and punk accessories, I'd love to replicate it! Sounds like what you've got going for you ;D And I love your attitude - 'I look strange to most people anyway'! Very laisse-faire :DDD ♥
At October 18, 2009 at 11:55 AM , Anonymous said...: I've never heard anyone complaining about high heels with loli, and definitely not hairstyles o-o Personally I think that ponytail looks lovely and classic and the heels simply give the style a bit of a more mature apperance. And that is a great achievement for a sweet loli xD

I love to see not-loli-things matched with loli, it gives you inspiration and broadens your views! :3
At October 19, 2009 at 11:07 AM , Trish said...: What's also interesting is the insistence that OMG LOLITA ISN'T SEXY!!1 in defence against high heels. I should probably do an article on this soon but...lolita can certainly be interpreted as subtly sexy depending on the wearer.
At October 19, 2009 at 12:34 PM , Zeruda said...: I love this post. Simply because I think you are amazing. You are so right about everything. I love how you bend the rules your own way, because it reminds me of myself and what I am looking for. I do call myself lolita but i take inspiration from more than one corner. I have developed my own style. I don't like when people want a specific name on my style, it's just me, my style. It reflects everything I am in a symbolic way. Everything I like and dream of. Every keyshaped accessory represent a secret every furry bunny ear represent a longing and every pocket watch reflects the world of an alice. I use everything I like to express myself. I don't care so much about shades and patterns to match anymore. Since i found Alice Deco I realized I have lived in a box for to long and it was time for this bud to burst into bloom.

http://lookbook.nu/zeruda
At October 19, 2009 at 9:27 PM , Anonymous said...: All your posts are so wonderful!! This one is especially nice as to how to seperating what you lolita items you want to wear, and ones that are just not suitable for you. I have a question for anyone who is willing to answer: Why are ponytails considered non-lolita? Personally, I think that whenever I wear a ponytail it looks more elegant and pretty than when I have my hair down. It doesn't seem very sporty when I have it up. If I add a few bows and hairclips, will a ponytail work?
At October 21, 2009 at 6:50 AM , Anya said...: The strict lolita look is always very nice to look at, like I deeply love what AP does, but I wouldn't wear the whole look myself as it's not my style and I don't have a second personnality when I'm dressed in lolita, I'm still myself.
I discovered recently that what brought me in lolita was the "shape" of the style, the bell shape skirt...and it is so so beautiful with a pair of high heels, the long legs under that sweet bell shaped dress, delicate and so feminine ! When I realised that I didn't care about the rules anymore. The heels bring a more mature twist, feminine and can break the childish look of an AP dress.
Lolita is an inspiration before everything, not an uniform we have to strictly wear, we can love this style and yet know what we like besides that, know what brings out our silhouette even if it's not loli. We're not clones and the only crime we did was to have fun with our clothes !
At October 23, 2009 at 10:14 PM , Victoria Suzanne said...: @Sniper: I consider heels more classy than sexy, myself.

@Zeruda: Beautiful statement! I'm so happy to hear that people love their own, personal style.

@Anonymous: thank you! I added a bow to mine I think it's more lolita that way, but I think that could be personal opinion.

@Anya: I love your comment; perfect!

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Saturday, October 17, 2009

Surviving a Fashion Identity Crisis

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