Mirror, Mirror

The other day a friend of mine and I were talking about the importance, or perhaps the illusion - of vanity. Vanity, sometimes labeled as one of the deadly sins in place of pride, is something we are meant to be ashamed of. Being called vain or shallow is definitely an insult, and we don't want people to think we are over-involved in ourselves, especially our appearances.

As lolitas, however, we go against this idea. Among ourselves, I think vanity is a concept that has mostly been silenced. I am not sure if I have ever heard a lolita called out by another as vain. It would probably be considered the ultimate in hypocrisy. After all, the lolita spends more time on her appearance than most people. It is, after all, what all of the subculture is built on. The look and style, from hair to clothes to makeup, is what distinguishes the lolita from the average person. She will spend endless time hunting down and selecting the proper clothes and accessories, learning to style her hair, and the correct way to line her lids or apply false eyelashes. She will make her own accessories if she has to, or even whole outfits, just to perfect the look she wants to achieve.

The lolita does all of these things to fulfill her own idea of what is beautiful. A lot of lolitas say that they enjoy how the style makes them feel - beautiful, they say. Like a princess. In a modern world where woman are often made to feel bad about themselves and their appearance, there is a sudden reversal. Being all dolled up, blowing kisses to the mirror, or even just admiring the pink glimmer on your lips - you feel happy. The emotional high we get out of beauty, or feeling that we contribute to that beauty, is what draws us to it in the first place. When we find something beautiful, we get a hit of pleasure off of it - whether is a new dress, a single snowdrop in spring, or even just light glinting off of a glass Coke bottle.

To delve a little deeper into this and paraphrase the words of author Cal Garrision: whenever we experience beauty, we experience evidence of the divine (in whatever form you believe that to be, be it a deity, the Universe, a spirit, the flow of karma, etc.) I know I have often found spiritual solace in the faded colors of a sunset or the perfectly sculpted towers of closed morning glory buds. Seeing something of beauty reminds us that this world is either very, very lucky accident or clearly blessed by some outside force. I know I do not usually get very spiritual in this blog, being as it is situated around a fashion, but in this case, I feel it applies.

So whenever you appreciate beauty or put the effort into your own, you are participating in a kind of meditation or prayer. It is a devotion to yourself, a promise to who you are. You carefully fix your spots with concealer, then daub the face with powder; smoothly run fingertips laden with eyeshadow over your lids. Do you painstakingly curl your eyelashes, with maybe a little trepidation? Or if makeup isn't your thing, perhaps you delicately work strands of hair around a curling iron, or tint streaks of it with pink dye. The dress you choose, simply because you like it, is a gift to yourself and your own sense of beauty. Every last accessory, of an image you have compiled, is unique to you.

So when vanity is brought into the equation, consider its meaning. It may be referred to as an overindulgence and attention to one's appearance, but if it is a deep attention to loving ourselves and trying to be be happy, how is this a bad thing? Is vanity just something cooked up by the jealous, who only wish they could live their lives with such fervor? Is vanity meant to oppress what should be rightfully ours? Or perhaps the term vanity is only the code word for really loving yourself - should anyone find out a girl's little secret of beauty.

Labels: culture, discussion, inspirational

posted by Victoria Suzanne @ 11:18 PM