For Public Safety!

Warning! This is public service announcement for all in the San Francisco Bay area. Several signs of suspicious ongoings have been spotted by the locals and management of variation retails and restaurants. They fear the worst: an invasion of the creature known as lolita. Here are a few signs to know if you have the beginnings of an infestation!

• Flashes of frills have been seen pelting through traffic and crosswalks, narrowly being avoided by oncoming trucks;
• Cookie crumbs and used tea cups are scattered about, typically with wires or Internet hook-up;
• A girl is adjusting her knee-highs on a street corner and there is nothing sexual about it;
• A mating call of 'look at the architecture!' has gone up around the city, typically at sunset in the historical district;
• Local teahouses start taking reservations for afternoon tea due to high demand;
• The purikura machines are out of order due to lack of sticker paper;
• All of the dessert-shaped erasers at the stationary shop are sold out;
• Lost ribbons are appearing on the sidewalk, in mailboxes, and caught on trees;
• You fetch your morning paper in slippers and bathrobe only to find a gang of fluffy things snapping photos and posing on the front stoop of your Victorian rowhouse;
• The ghost tours swell in number with a array of darkly beautiful guests;
  
• And for some reason, there is a trail of glitter and lost rhinestones near circling around Peace Plaza.
  

How do I know all these things? I've landed in SF this morning and have been camped mere blocks away from the New People building at the comfy lodgings of the Queen Anne Hotel. Peppered with haunted history and the most beautiful Victorian reconstruction style, it's a lovely place for lolitas to stay. You can read the full review on Miss Lumpy, if you're interested in staying in San Francisco in future.

See you at the BABY the Stars Shine Bright opening on Saturday!

Labels: event, humor

posted by Victoria Suzanne @ 12:26 AM